Friday, January 22, 2010

Guilt, among other things

There's been so much going on and so much on all of our minds.  This morning I spent an hour trying to reach via cell phone my husband to find out if 4 plane loads of supplies were going to land as previously planned.  Finally heard that, no, they weren't coming but a flight bringing some medical volunteers were coming in at 1:30.  Switched gears, relayed the messages I was given and went back home to have some coffee. 
I sat at breakfast with my two  houseguests.  They are a husband and wife (dentist and RN) who shared  their experiences and guilt in leaving Port au Prince.  They shared with me the issue wasn't so much a lack of staffing but supplies.  I tried to encourage them that we all have things we can do, just maybe not in Port right now.  I'm a Kreyol speaking R.N. as well and have wondered whether I should run down there; but have felt I needed to stay put and do what ONLY I could do.  Which at this point is to stay put, communicate for my husband and HIM staff and mother my daughters. 
I want our friends around the world to know that they aren't the only ones feeling frustrated with the images they see on CNN.  We're frustrated as well, but we're moving on.  Maybe we're used to always having a certain level of frustration here, but we go on and do what is before us.  My favorite author, Elisabeth Elliot, once wrote something like, even in the midst of tragedy and you don't know what to do, just do the next thing (the obvious).  I'm comforted myself with that as I've continued hanging up clothes on the line and other mundane things.  I know who is still in control.  We can trust Him.

1 comment:

tiffany said...

Debbie - you are also providing hope. Hope to Haitians, hope to those who are frustrated because we wish we could do more - and hope that because of individuals like you, Haiti will come out of this.

You are amazing!